Caring back

Hey you, closet kid,
Wrapped up in your room
I'm knocking on your door right now
Here, outside your tomb.
When I last checked, you were no mummy
No cadaver wrapped in thread
So please, sometime, give me a sign
That you're something more than dead.

Hey you, lighthouse keeper,
On your island, all alone
I'm rowing towards your lukewarm light
To find why you atone.
Whatever you have done or said
Means not a damn to me
Open up, come back to land,
There's a world you ought to see.

Hey you, shy recluse,
Hiding in the hills
I'm calling out into your cave
And it sure ain't for thrills.
I've come to say you should come out
Into my warm embrace
Leave your cold stones and silent sticks
I know a better place

Where've you gone,
You lightning bug,
You traffic light too long?
Where've you gone,
You coy chameleon,
What have we done wrong?

Where've you gone

But not forgotten.
No, you're well remembered here
The one who got away
Who never wrote
Never called
Never cared
The one who thought we're all the same
We won't notice when you're gone
We won't notice when we say your name
And some stranger takes it on
Some stranger silence
Than the one we knew before.

Was it us who drove you away?
Did we smother?
Did we squeeze?
Did we try to cage you up and make you sing?
You really should have told us
Told us to back off
Told us to back up
Told us you'd be back for us
Come back for us, someday

Or perhaps you drove yourself
Into your far off land
Is it a vacation?
I just can't understand!
Did you need to rest awhile,
Or perhaps you're just afraid?
You know that you don't have to fear
The friendships that you've made.

You know, right?
Can you hear us calling?
Can you hear us crying?
Can you hear us caring?
Can you hear our pleas, our plights, our prayers?
We miss you
We need you
We love you
Love you
Love you
Love you
Talk to us!
Tell us what's wrong
What we can do to make your days
All right
All bright
All light
We'll send your dark away
Or hold your hand
Til the sun comes back again.

All you have to do is ask.

Hey you, holy hermit,
Up there in the sky
Your children would just like to ask
For your reason why.
Why you don't return the love
We send to you each day,
Why you never do respond
To the prayers that we say,
Why you seem to be afraid
To give us what we lack,
Do you fear that if you do
We'd end up

Caring back?

None of the Above.

How can I love you, if you don't love me?
How can I see you, if I'll always be
The backup
The second
Bestest friend through and through
Can I be blind and claim to be true?

I'm an old man, with eyes fallen out
No meat on my bones
Much hair in my snout
I'm an old hand at the waiting game
Walking towards Mecca with two legs too lame.

Hop on a bus
Ride in a car
Jump on a plane
It won't be so far
You'll get there so fast
No call for this fuss
Just cheat in your quest
Come be just like us
No need to walk the walk
When you can talk your soul away

I am a pilgrim
A modest man
A humble man
Stumbling towards Jerusalem
Stumbling, bumbling, fumbling to my Broken-Promised Land

I am a pilgrim
A virtuous man
A devoted man
Swimming the sea to America
Swimming, for I will not sail
Swimming, for I will not fly
Swimming, for I have no angel wings to get me
To my land of liberty.
Swimming, but I won't break free
'Fore my inner fire burns out.

I am a pilgrim
A bitter man
A jaded man
Sitting down in the path to the City of God
The path with no guide
The path with no trail
The path with no end
Save yourself.

How can I love you?
How can I care?
How can I help you
When you're always nowhere?
Am I a crutch?
Or just training wheels?
Is this despair
Or just how love feels?

Oh Lord, What a Mourning
Oh Lord, Sad Sad Day
Oh Lord, What a Mourning
For Your Son Has Faded Away

Did Jesus ever want everyone else to be perfect?
Did he ever stop to think
Why do I preach what they can't understand?
They know not what I do
What I say
Why I pray
To save the souls of those
Who see a means
Not a man
Who hear promises
Not love
Who wish Heaven
Not earth.

God is all of us.
God loves all of us.
So why can't we love ourselves?
Why can't we love each other
Without a fuck in the way?
Why can't we share love
Instead of making it?
Forcing it
Commanding it
To serve
To please
To stay
Until the mourning cums

God loves all of us.
So why is love so hard to find?
Why is love hidden
A heartstring in a haystack
A long lost holy grail
Buried twixt a rock
And a hard place

A men! A women! A girls and boys!
Look at what Santa's brought you,
Such candy and toys!
Jesus brought love, but he died like the rest
We still want his gift,
But we won't pass his test
Won't do his homework
Won't study
Study
Study
Learn
Grow
And be the men he meant for us to be

We are a world of children
With hungry hearts
And starving minds
Hands upraised for handouts
When there's good food all around.

But eat your candy
Rot your teeth
Discontent I doth bequeath
To you and yours,
If sweet your way
More sweet turns sour
Every day

I didn't mean to turn your water into whines
I didn't mean to bake this bread of strife
Eat of me
For me
Share me
For I am the love of the world
To be savored
Not devoured to a bloat
Nor fasted til the end of days.

The trees are where the good times lie
Amidst the azure, hopeful sky.
Above the ground, all you can see's
A big ole world that's all fo' free.
But you say you ain't got no wings?
Don't want none of them stinky thangs?
You just wanna sit, wit' yo' butt on the ground
And frown yo' life away.
Well dat's ok
If you wanna cry
For everything you didn't say
For everything that came what may
For every game you didn't play
For ever since you lost the way
To transcendental bliss.
Well, you can sit and sigh all day
Myself, I like t' fly.

Why you gotta be an anorexic?
Why you gotta binge yo'self
Then purge your soul away?
Why you gotta
Run!
Run!!
RUN!!!
'Til you die?
Come on baby, cop a feeling
Move with the emotion
Love like you ain't never had none befo'
As if you ain't never had none befo'
You ain't never had none
You ain't never had

None of the above.

Wings

God forbid I live alone!
God forbid I fill my life with joys outside myself.
God forbid I wake
With a sigh
As I lie
And rise
And fall
And wait
And wait
And wait to fly
To live without my feet
Stuck firmly on the ground.

People say Go take a walk!
Ride a cab!
Talk the talk!
There's more to this than only you and me.
And I happen to agree.
I have eyes, I too can see
The hustle and the bustle that makes mankind march on
March til it is forced to walk
Or ride a cab
With no one to talk
With no one to walk
With no one to give a damn.

But then, I say, I'll donate damns!
I'll provide bastards, bitches, slams
I'll tarnish, torture, terrorize
With a gleam behind my eyes
That shows I really care.

I care.
You care.
We all care for others.
I loved.
You loved.
We're loved by just our mothers.
Or our fathers.
Or a monk somewhere
With no strand of hair
Upon his brow,
The one that trascends time
And space
And all the wondrous human race
And loves the little children.

Jesus loves me, so I'm told
But I'm not like the Jews of old
I'm not God's chosen,
Chosen person to be free.
I'm an Icarus, it's true
And every time I try anew
I fly, then flying, falling, flew
Flew right smack to the ground.
God gave me wings
Those pretty things
Wings of a universal sort
His malevolent retort
His "here's mankind"
Kind enough to give you wings
Give me wings of wax.

Relax! the crowd all says to me
Wait awhile, you'll surely see
That there's an oppurtunity
Behind each smiling face.
For you see, each human race
Has its admirers
Its wretched masses
Its desirers
Yearning to breathe free
Yearning to fly
To fly, just once
To fly just once before they die
Before they cry
Their last golden tear
Into the melting pot.

What rot!
What dismal, bleak, romantic snot
To think one cannot live
Without one's wings.
What good would it do you to soar?
Go places you've not dreamed before?
If on the land you're
With your everythings
Your everything
Your body requires
Your mind retires
Your soul expires
And your feet keep marching on.

Sally forth, to meet the world!
Sally ahead, your flag unfurled
Sally to your cannon,
Cannon fodder.
Cannons can just shoot so high
So high, into that huge blue sky
High enough to shoot down wings of wax
Wings of wax, but not wings true and blue
Through and through
Me and you
Soaring through the clouds.

Or, perhaps, you can march on
And you can dodge each giant bomb
And you can gather up the pieces time and time and time again.
But then again, my dearest friend
Every time you stop and bend
To gather yourself into your hands
You'll remember that those who fly
Those who fly will never die
Alone.

For when they die, some souls may cry,
But they'll just sigh
And soar so high
Soar, upon their

Wings.

Letting Go

Sometimes it's hard to sleep alone.
Sometimes it's hard to sigh a moan
And know no one can hear.

Sometimes it's hard to change the guard.
Sometimes when you wish for a ritard
You still accelerate.

Sometimes it's hard to just let go.
Sometimes you swim against the flow
Of days, but still you're swept away.

It's hard to sleep alone.
It's hard to lie awake at night and fear the end of days.
To fear the loss of you and them
Who fade away
Day by day
Way by way
Until you're all but gone.

Then new cadets take up the flag
To wage the war against the times

I feel alone.

But when the veterans finally part,
Those grizzled friends who know my heart,
I just can't help but hate to see them go.
I just can't help but want to cry
Want to sigh
Want to die
Want to never feel such loss again, again.

Now I know why it's so hard to open up the doors.
Hard to let them see
The ups and downs and all arounds
That make a mess of man.

My misery loathes company,
Because it hates to flee.
But when the guests have all gone home,
It comes right back to me.
Right smack to me
Right tackles me
right onto the floor

Then someone new pulls me up
Dusts me off
Holds me
hold me hold me hold me
With no threat of letting go.

But they'll let go.
And I'll let go.
And I'll let gone into my histories
And it will hurt
And I will cry
And I will sigh and wish to die
Then someone else will walk on by
The comings forth and letting go's that make a lifetime last.

So go, my friends, return at will,
For I'll be waiting, still still still
I'll be waiting, and if you return,
We'll live and love and laugh and learn
But if perchance you stay away
I wish you joy and, come what may,
I hope we'll meet again someday
Someday when we all finish

Letting go.

What is Wrong?

Making love's a sin
But making hate is great
Tell me once again
Why I have to wait
Tell me to
Abstain from world peace
Save myself for cancer
Snort my cherry coke
Cherry soda with no
Pop!

Time heals all wounds.
Except the heart
Except the head
Except the mistakes
The "accidents" that make us
Shake us
Break us
Time heals all wounds
Before it snuffs you out.

I didn't know
Tried not to care
Didn't change my underwear
For something apropos

Rips and nails and puppy dog wails
That's what I was made of.

Give me some sugar
Spice up my life
Could've been such a nice girl
Lovely girl
Give us a twirl

Was there no receipt when I was born?
No lifetime warranty?
"Error. Does not compute. Please insert card again."
Call tech support.
Can you feel me God?
Feel me up?
No?
The whole world's in your hand
I'd think that you would understand
How you've got it wrong.

Got me wrong
All wrong
My voice, my thighs
My piercing eyes
My stalagmite sans a cave
Heresy
Blasphemy
Something apropos

Be the change you want to see.
Cave in
Chest out
Give us a twirl
My little girl
And tell me what went wrong.

Wish you were here
Instead of me
One more little girl makes three
Two's company
We're a crowd
We'd get too loud
Something's got to give
Give up
Put out
Shut up
No doubt
No doubt in my mind
It's all in my head.

How crass
How crude
How low
How rude
To think my conscience could spare some change.

This dictatorship has gone on long enough
It's too hard
Too prickly
Don't get cocky, now
Hubris is as hubris does.
Double your pleasure,
Halve your son
Add an X-tra
Y not

Transfer my soul, transform my heart
Give me wings, tear me apart
Tell me that I'm just insane
Tell me that it's just disdain
Tell me that it's just a pain
Tell me, tell me, do explain
Tell me

What is wrong?